a little bit of color

I was driving to work the other day and a song came on the radio, An Audience of One by the Cold War Kids. It is truly an amazing song. I don't know exactly what it is about it that I like or why it makes me think of deep rich purples and blues with a little bit of red. But it does.

As I was driving, I realized that I associate almost my whole life and the different experiences that I have with different and or multiple colors. It was somewhat of a revelation for me due to the fact that I don't think I ever understood how I thought through emotions in my life or how I dealt with them. What I do is put things, experiences, people, places and songs into different categories by color. The deeper the color the stronger the emotional tie I have to it.

The best example that I can think of is my Grandmother. To me, she is lavender and roses and food and pajamas. I can not look at the color lavender without immediately thinking of my grandmother, which then leads to her love of roses and gardening and at last her passion for food. Food thus leads to pajamas which she had an incredible affinity for and was very picky about.

Lavender for me is peaceful. It is beautiful, it is calm. It is poised. These are the things that I always associate with Grandma. That is why she is lavendar. Lavendar and greens are very rare colors that I associate with people. These are two colors that I hold very close and very deeply. If that makes any sense... They are special and hold deep meaning.

Now, there are other colors and yes ones for being angry or upset, but those colors are different just as those feelings are different. This is what I am going to start looking at. I want to figure out what the different colors mean to me and why I view people and emotion with color. I want to know what is making my mind tick a certain way. So I am going to start writing about different experiences or poeple in my life and what colors I view them as.

I am holding the belief that this will help me to better understand the way that I work and maybe be able to help me work through some issues. I will keep you updated.